Love Me in the Morning

I wake up in the light of my friend's small room. She calls it a cabin.  With the low ceiling, checkered bed sheets and big fur throw that warms my body I can see why.

I adjust to my surroundings and smile.  I am safe, I am happy, I am loved.  Three things I wish to feel my whole life even though some mornings feel quite the opposite.

The other week when I lost my purse, keys and phone, I checked into a hotel at 2 a.m. terrified.  Luckily I had my bank cards in my pocket.  I was physically unharmed but the night rattled me hard.  I woke up the next morning and for a faint second thought "oh good I'm in my bed," before I realized I was in a strange hotel room on my own.

Life has been throwing me a lot of the unexpected.  Sometimes I feel I am being tested.  Or more likely, taught.  Slowly all creature comforts and normalcy seem to be slipping out of my hands.  And while I often crave the state of discomfort, the state of growth, I forget how soul shaking it can be to be in the thrust of it.

I crave adventure, the unknown, the fight against normalcy and a boring life.  But I also crave waking up in the morning feeling those three things : safe, happy, loved.

I hope it is not too much to ask.