Toronto has been yet another whirlwind in this year of adventure, and I'm finding myself, after so much happiness and excitement, feeling exhausted.
I have been riding such a high that the moment I stop I'm aware of how tired I am.
It's easy to lose parts of yourself on the road. I miss my quiet, introspective side. I miss feeling healthy, in tune with my body and the earth. I also miss putting other people first.
I have been very selfish this past year. I left a marriage and my perfectly planned life, took an unmarked road and never turned back. It was terrifying. I hardly recognized myself at times. But I put myself first, asked for help when I needed it, rested when I was too tired to face another day, and jumped blindly into new adventures when I needed to feel alive. It was all necessary but I now feel like myself again and am ready to give back.
The first step is to ground myself a little. As I find myself and my energy I am prepared to be the kind of daughter, niece, cousin, friend and role model for other young women that I want to be. Then it's time to start looking at the big picture and seeing how I can make a difference in the world. I have no doubt that I am here for a reason, and I am not putting this newfound strength and fire to waste.
Next stop - Vancouver. Home. I'm going to let nature and new projects recharge me and then build up an appetite for the next adventure. Something tells me I'm on the right path.