My friend asked me a great question this morning: what motivated you to get into this? I was flooded with a million thoughts. The first one was an image of myself building the hippie yoga retreat over a year ago.
I remember being surrounded by a rainbow of characters from all walks of life. I observed what made them special and what made them happy. They all had some kind of gift to share in terms of music, skill, or energy. They were all also strong, healthy and vibrant.
In this situation, and every other situation where I was travelling and vulnerable, I found myself wishing I felt stronger and healthier physically.
Here's the thing: you can only pack so many things in your suitcase. When you travel you are often presenting yourself in a bare state: without your surroundings, your friends and family, your comforts from home.
I often found myself wishing I had a stronger version of myself to take along. One who felt strong enough to walk for miles and lift any bag, one who felt good in no matter what she was wearing, no matter what the weather was.
I realized how important it was to love and take care of myself in every way. Because I always want to pack the best version of myself. Because I am nothing to anyone when I am run down. I will never change the world hungover and depressed. I have work to do.
I have sat with this feeling for a long time. In the summer I started to take myself more seriously and it changed my world. I had reason to get up in the morning and liked the way I felt. I held myself differently.
My parents, who arrived from France, almost cried when they saw me "We have never seen you look so healthy! This is the first time we're not worried about you!" It made them feel good too. I was no longer frail in body or mind.
I now see that I have the tools to accomplish whatever I set my mind to. There is always a way.
I'm also lucky in that I now have a partner I can do these things with. My health has always been such an important part of my life but has never been something I've been able to share before. He motivates and inspires me daily.
So what's my motivation? A better life. A tool for dealing with stress, anxiety and depression. A strong body to take with me on travels and life experiences. The strength to go a little further, to accomplish more, and to continue to surprise myself.